posted by Billy Carpenter
WWE kicks off 2016 with…Superstars?! Indeed, the first offering of the new year comes to us in the form of everyone’s favorite C show and we kick it off with Darren Young making his way out to the ring! His opponent is a guy who had a real strange 2015, Adam Rose.
Darren Young vs Adam Rose
Tony Chimel still doing the ring announcing, for those wondering. What IS Adam Rose’s character these days? Is he the ‘party pooper’ still? If so, why is he getting his full ‘Break Away’ theme? In any event, he takes control early as Byron & Rich give us the explanation behind the PTP’s recent singles excursions. Young retaliates with a hard back elbow that sends Rose to the apron. Back suplex on the apron by Young! Back in, Darren goes for the 10 punches in the corner but gets caught with a stun gun on the top rope. Rose takes over yet again, delivering some hard crossface forearms in the ropes. Young tries to fight out of a chinlock but gets sent in to the corner. Clothesline by Rose followed by a big boot for 2. Young fights back with rights & lefts and gets a nice belly to belly throw. Spinning elbow by Young gets 2. Young charges in the corner but gets caught with a back elbow. Rose goes for a tornado DDT but D-Young counters and hits the Gut Check for the win! Fun while it lasted, actually.
WINNER: Darren Young via pinfall
From RAW, Vince goes to jail but makes it back just in time to make a title match for the first RAW of 2016.
In case you missed it the first 36 times this week, The Rock is heading to WrestleMania this year:
Also from RAW, a decent 6 man affair between The Usos & Dean Ambrose vs Sheamus, King Barrett & Ru-Ru. Match was ok but Kevin Owens makes up for it by decimating Dean post-match.
It’s time for this week’s Superstars main event and we’ve got tag team action to close out the first show of 2016!
The Ascension vs Jack Swagger & Mark Henry
I’m weirdly hyped for the combo of Swagger & Henry. Swagger & Viktor to start. Small “Sexual Chocolate” chant and Mark obliges the crowd with an awkward hip swivel on the apron. Swagger gets a go-behind takedown but Viktor fires back with some elbows. Jack punches his way out of the corner and hits a big clothesline! Viktor rolls outside to regroup as we go to commercial break…
…Viktor is back in control as we come back. Jack picks the ankle, looking for the Patriot Lock. He is shoved off and Connor interferes before making his way into the match. Clothesline by Connor followed by a high knee by Viktor gets a 2. Viktor works a front face lock and despite Swagger’s best efforts, he’s sent to The Ascension’s corner. He is able to fight both Viktor & Connor off though and tag in Mark Henry. HE IS A HOUSE OF FIRE—Jack pulls Viktor outside and cinches in the ankle lock before Mark hits a World’s Strongest Slam on Connor and very suddenly ends this match !
WINNERS: Jack Swagger & Mark Henry via pinfall
We close out this week’s show with John Cena vs Alberto Del Rio for the US title from RAW. Not much to write home about this week for Superstars. It may be easier to do these shows in 2 week chunks at a time; we’ll see going forward. Swagger teaming with Henry was interesting though and it was nice for one of these announce teams to finally mention the PTP going their separate ways again (for now). Nothing to see here this week though, skip this and watch Main Event instead.