What's this? New title? New blog! Yes readers, a year and change into wading through a twisted landscape of weird, wacky and often woeful wrestling figures I spotted an opportunity to spread my metaphorical wings and scope out new toy horizons. The wrestling figures aren't going anywhere however and I'm still trying to procure more … Continue reading Action Figure Fight Club: Here Comes A New Challenger.
by William Renken I don’t think I’m alone as a wrestling fan in admitting there were periods where my fandom wained. I seem to remember 1994 was the last strong year for me as my interest dropped for about 3 years until Steve Austin exploded into pop culture. 1994 was special for wrestling specifically where … Continue reading 1996: The Year of the Return…to Greatness
In the best of 2016 list I featured a giant Goldberg figure among my favourites, mostly because I couldn't quite believe how ludicrously big it was. So imagine my joy upon discovering on a certain online auction site a figure that dwarfs even Big Bill. Ladies and gentlemen, call the kaiju defence force as I … Continue reading Woeful Wrestling Figures: Goldzilla VS Nashra
The retirement of The Undertaker is one of those things I and expect many knew was coming but didn't really want to happen. All good things must come to an end after all. It feels weird to be almost mourning a fictional character no longer being on my screen but while I may not be … Continue reading Thank you Taker
One: Dim Lights. I who wear spandex and pretend to fight I who do this dance night after night I who still help set the ring up just right I am a professional wrestler I who count the lights on the ceiling I who am an expert at selling a beating I who lose without … Continue reading Professional: A Wrestling Poem in 3 parts.
The march of progress is one of incremental steps. This is as true for wrestling toys as any other aspect of human endeavor. Modern wrestling toys have hit a peak of blending articulation, playability and sculpting that can please both child and child-like in equal measure. Such achievement hasn't come without some teething problems and … Continue reading Woeful Wrestling Figures: Trip Hazard.
Part One: Indie-pendence. I who wear spandex and pretend to fight I who do this dance night after night I who still help set the ring up just right I am a professional wrestler I who count the lights on the ceiling I who am an expert at selling a beating I who lose without … Continue reading Professional: A Wrestling Poem.
Alright, it's been long enough I think. Time once again to not do my homework and peer at a lamentable lump of plastic putrescence and document my findings. I do this for science, not clicks. As luck would have it, Samoa Joe has just made a rather memorable debut on Monday Night Raw, proving that … Continue reading Woeful Wrestling Figures: Yo Joe!
Alright, let's get 2017 started in the right way, with crappy toys instead of expensive fireworks, gallons of alcohol, nameless party guests and the ever-present threat of a social disease. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. The Christmas season may be over for another 11 and a bit months but I come from the … Continue reading Woeful Wrestling Figures: A Little Pump ‘N’ Grind.
Happy holidays Internet, 'tis the season to make list posts (fa la la la la, etc) and being the hack fraud that I am I've decided to get a piece of clickbait pie and try to put a full stop at the end of my fraught journey through this mad, bad and very weird year … Continue reading Woeful Wrestling Figures: 2016 A Toy Odyssey.